I am a woman. I have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I am aware that this world is full of evil but also full of good. There are many human pleasures in life, most of which fall into the following categories: giving, receiving, food, brotherly love, and sex.
We as humans desire pleasure for all 5 senses- taste, smell, touch, sight, feel. Some argue that these desires are much more than desires– that they are, at times, needs. Why deprive yourself of pleasure and joy?
There are several arguments for and against the above point of view, and I fully intend to investigate them and form my own solid and confident stance. But right now, I just want to pour out the thoughts and feelings I am having, a diverse melting pot in my mind.
My moral side is very much in conflict with my emotional and physical sides. Why should I not enjoy sex and the like for the point of sheer pleasure, I ask myself? In the Bible, God says that sex is to be had between a man and woman who are fully committed to each other under God in marriage. Sex is sacred. I really want to question that though, and to ague with it. But why argue with God? Is He (and his word) not sovereign in my life? I don’t know. What I do know is that I’m 21 going on 22 and I want to enjoy life’s pleasures at this point without holding back.
I have many friends from all different backgrounds and of all different beliefs. Just about all of them have dabbled (to say the least) in sexual activity. My close friend who is a devout Anglican got to second base (and maybe hird) many times with her ex. She has masturbated for years. But she calls masturbating something she “struggles with.” She wants to stop it because it is not “Godly.” But it’s been a few years and she hasn’t stopped yet. I also have several friends who masturbate and have casual sex very regularly. It’s a kind of “I do it when I want, because it feels good” sorta thing. I even have a former coworker who, when asked if she masturbates, stared blankly at us and said “Well yeah! (duhh) I have needs!) I will note that these people are also into many things like drinking, smoking, and atheism. I don’t think they are the happiest of people.
What about my older sister? She’s never been drunk, never smoked, never questioned the morals our parents taught us. She is 24 years old and has never been kissed. She had a boyfriend once who put his arm around her and somewhat platonically cuddled with her, but that is it. I don’t know if she desires anything sexually that is not within a Christian marriage. But if she does, she hasn’t thought twice about waiting. She keeps her faith at the very top of her moral grounds. That is admirable. Am I a bad Christian? I worry that in questioning all of this, I am running from God in a way. But I’m human, and my desires and considerations are not unique.
More thoughts on this to come.