[JUST] A SEED

What is the purpose of life, as far as I can tell?
To pick up my cross, leave the rest behind, and follow Him.

This summer, which has only just begun, looks like it will be a trade-off of time spent working, time spent with church friends, and time spent trying to… fill in empty spaces and waste…time.

What is “wasted time”, really?
Time during which I am not being “productive”?
Time during which I am not saving lives?
Time during which I am not directly working to expand the kingdom of Christ?

The above questions all seem so relative and empty, but dammit, why do I KEEP COMING BACK TO THEM, OVER AND OVER?

I have engrained in myself this deep sense that life goes by more quickly and is more precious than our present day society is lead to believe. And thus, every single day, each passing breath, is a seed falling from a prosperous plant. It alone has the potential to produce 100 times what it began as, but it can also easily fall away and be lost to the wind, JUST A SEED.

With this sense, and what I suppose you could consider a “theory,” I put a great deal of weight on every day of my life. Each day is a chance to build onto this gorgeous garden of purpose and life and prosperity, but it can also be disposed of and forgotten. JUST A BREATH.

Sometimes I take these thoughts and I become so obsessed that I tell myself that each day that I do not literally save lives is a day wasted away. Every single day I should be expanding the body of Christ, nurturing my relationship with Him, giving, and above all LOVING.

Right?

The issue of this all being extremely relative has not gone away…

So am I running in circles?
I am to an extent,
but I think I’m back running them
for the millionth time
because there is something precious
that I did not notice before.

………………………………………………..
Thank you for reading. Criticism, questions, thoughts are ALL invited! I won’t grow as a writer unless I receive honest feedback.

Peace,
Tanya